Jokes/Poetry or anythin alike!

[color=indigo]LOL, I found these two short video clips to be very funny n helpful rofl

.are weddings expensive??? this bro's ..got a lil piece of advice

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rH2nNt1s5pk

online Matrimonials......hmmm think again!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hgRFVDc7z48&mode=related&search= [/color]

tum chupa na sakogii main voh raaz huun

tum bhula na sakogii voh andaaz huun

guunjtaa huun jo dil men to hairaan ho kyon

main tumhaare hii dil kii to aawaaz huun

sun sako to suno dhaRkanon kii zubaan

main yahaan huun yahaan huun yahaan huun yahaan

I'm the secret that you can't hide;

I'm the impulse that you can't forget.

When I echo in your heart, why are you surprised?

I'm your heart's very voice.

If you can hear it, then listen to the language of your heartbeat.

I'm here, I'm here, I'm here, here.

veer zaara has some sick lyrics innit.

If they are sick why post them?

Sick is good. Apparently.

[quote="Don Karnage"]If they are sick why post them?[/quote]

lol bloody english people eh! :twisted:

Med a bollywood fan?

now that is sick

BTW i burned a CD the other day for my car with the song "agar tum mil jayo"

its a top remix-and it reminds me of u

[quote="MuslimSisLilSis"]Med a bollywood fan?

now that is sick

BTW i burned a CD the other day for my car with the song "agar tum mil jayo"

its a top remix-and [b]it reminds me of u[/b][/quote]

who? me?

that song reminds of me?

😢

yeh u posted the lyrics up once remember

i remember teasing u about it-but i gotta admit its a top song

i often play it in my car-even my sis likes it 😛

[quote="MuslimSisLilSis"]yeh u posted the lyrics up once remember

i remember teasing u about it-but i gotta admit its a top song

i often play it in my car-even my sis likes it :P[/quote]

yeh - I remember. Kinda surprised you do aswell.

and yr right - it [b]is[/b] a top song. the best IMHO.

This is a tale of an average man,

Who acts contrary to Allah's plan,

If you are reflected herein,

Then repent, and commit no sin.

It was early in the morning at four

When death knocked upon a bedroom door

"Who is there?" the sleeping one cried

I'm Izrael let me inside

At once, the man began to shiver

As one sweating in deadly fever

He shouted to his wife

"Don't let him take away my life."

"Please go away, O Angel of Death

I'm not ready yet

My family, on me depend

Give me a chance, to go back and mend .

The angel knocked again and again

"Friend, I'll take your life without any pain

It's your soul that Allah requires

I come not with my own desires.

Bewildered, the man began to cry

"O Angel, I'm so afraid to die

I'll give you gold and be your slave

Don't send me to the unlit grave.

"Let me in O friend", the angel said

"Open the door, get up from your bed

If you do not allow me in

I will walk through it like a Jinn.

The man held a gun in his right hand

Ready to defy the Angel's stand

"I'll point my gun towards your head

You dare come in - I'll shoot you dead.

By now, the Angel was in the room

Saying, "O friend - prepare for your doom

Foolish man - Angels never die

Put down your gun and do not sigh."

"Why are you afraid - Tell me O man

To die according to Allah's plan?

Come - smile at me, do not be grim

Be happy to return to him."

"O Angel, I bow my head in shame

I had no time to remember Allah's name

From dawn 'til dusk, I made my wealth

Not even caring for my spiritual health."

"Allah's commands I never obeyed,

Nor five times a day I ever prayed,

A Ramadhaan came and a Ramadhaan went,

But no time had I to repent."

"The Hajj was already obligatory upon me

But I would not part with my money

All charities I did ignore

Taking usury more and more."

"Sometimes I sipped my favorite wine,

With flirting women I sat to dine.

O angel I appeal to you,

Spare my life for a year or two."

"The laws of the Qur'aan, I will obey

I'll begin Salaat - this very day.

My Fast and Hajj I will complete

And keep away from self-conceit."

"I will refrain from usury

And give all my wealth to charity

Wine and unlawful women , I will detest

Allah's oneness I will attest."

We Angels do what Allah demands

We cannot go against his commands

Death is ordained for everyone

Father, mother, daughter and son."

"I'm afraid, this moment is your last

Now be reminded of your past.

I do understand your fears

But it is now too late for tears."

"You lived in this world, two score or more

Never did you, your people adore

Your parents you did not obey

Hungry beggars, you turned away."

"Your two ill-gotten, female offspring

In nightclubs, for livelihood they sing.

Instead of making more Muslims

You made your children non-Muslims."

"You ignored the muadhin's Adhan (call to prayer)

Nor did you read the holy Quraan.

Breaking promises all you life

Backbiting friends and causing strife."

"From hoarded goods, great profits you made

And your poor workers - you underpaid.

Horses and cards were your leisure

Money-making was your pleasure."

"You ate vitamins and grew more fat

With the very sick - you never sat.

A pint of blood, you never gave

which could a little baby save."

"O human, you have done enough wrong

You bought good properties for a song.

When the farmers appealed to you

You did not have mercy, this is true."

"Paradise for you? I cannot tell

Undoubtedly you will dwell in hell.

There is no time for you to repent

I'll take your soul for which I am sent."

The ending however is very sad

Eventually, the man became mad

With a cry, he jumped out of bed

And suddenly, he fell down dead.

O! Reader take a moral from here

Never know, your end may be near.

Change your living and make amends

For heaven, on your deeds depend.

[quote="MuslimSisLilSis"]Med a bollywood fan?

now that is sick

BTW i burned a CD the other day for my car with the song "agar tum mil jayo"

its a top remix[/quote]

True, that is one bollywood song that is actually very nice! My bro is into bollywood songs :?

Before when I used to listen to songs, I never listened to bollywood coz I always thought it was lame but old songs do have a purpose to them and most are clean but then again never been a fan of old songs, loved hip hop and r&b though.

One day, a guy is walking down the street when he notices a little old lady just sitting on her porch in her rocking chair with a big smile on her face like everything is all right, life is good. A week passes by, and he has seen this old lady in her rocking chair every day, just smiling away. Finally, he brings up the nerve to go and talk to her.

He asks her"I've seen you every day for a week, just sitting here in you rocking chair, happy as can be, with not a care in the world. Please tell me...What's your secret?"

All the while with that smile on her face, she says "No problem, sonny. I'll tell ya my secret. I eat nothing but junk food every day, I smoke 3 packs of cigarettes, and drink a bottle of Jack Daniel's whiskey every day."

The guy is astonished and says "Wow!! I can't believe it!! You do that every day?"

She replies "Yes, sir"

He asks "How old are you?"

She says "I'm 24".

lol thats funny

Q. How can you tell when a Pakistani is lying?

A. His lips are moving.

Q. What do you have when a Pakistani is buried up to his neck in sand?

A. Not enough sand.

Q. Did you Hear about the terrorist that hijacked a 747 full of Pakistanis?

A. He threatened to release one every hour if his demands weren't met.

Q. You're locked in a room with Saddam Hussain, Adolf Hitler, and a Pakistani. You have a gun with three bullets. What do you do?

A. Shoot the Pakistani thrice to make sure he's dead.

😂 dont take offence anyone, its jus funny

That last one's a bit disconcerting.

[quote="Beast"]That last one's a bit disconcerting.[/quote]

which means?

www.dictionary.com

[quote="Angel"][quote="MuslimSisLilSis"]Med a bollywood fan?

now that is sick

BTW i burned a CD the other day for my car with the song "agar tum mil jayo"

its a top remix[/quote]

True, that is one bollywood song that is actually very nice! My bro is into bollywood songs :?

Before when I used to listen to songs, I never listened to bollywood coz I always thought it was lame but old songs do have a purpose to them and most are clean but then again never been a fan of old songs, loved hip hop and r&b though.[/quote]

just like me 8)

i also am more into hip hop and r&b-never was into bollywood cos thats just gay

but i am fond of the classics such as "churalia" by bally sagoo etc

[quote="Sirus"]Q. How can you tell when a Pakistani is lying?

A. His lips are moving.

Q. What do you have when a Pakistani is buried up to his neck in sand?

A. Not enough sand.

Q. Did you Hear about the terrorist that hijacked a 747 full of Pakistanis?

A. He threatened to release one every hour if his demands weren't met.

Q. You're locked in a room with Saddam Hussain, Adolf Hitler, and a Pakistani. You have a gun with three bullets. What do you do?

A. Shoot the Pakistani thrice to make sure he's dead.

😂 dont take offence anyone, its jus funny[/quote]

Theyre more like Irish man's jokes sounds funnier when you put 'Irish' man in the joke.

Chehra chupaa liya hai, kaash aankh bhi chupaa liya karti,

Muhabbat aksar aankh ke rastey dil mein uttar aati hai.

Having veiled the face, you should have concealed your eyes too,

Love often enters into the heart through the eyes.

Our Fair Share

One day after Jummah, three men who worked inside the Masjid were counting collections taken after Jummah for the week. Their Imam had gone away to Hajj so they didn’t know exactly how to divide the money. They were trying to come up with an equitable way to divide the money between God and themselves.

The first man who was very pious was first to speak: "I know what! I'll draw a line down the middle of the Masjid, toss the money up in the air, and whatever falls on the right side of the line is for the cause of Allah (SWA) and whatever falls on the left side is for us".

The second man cried, "No! No! No! I'll draw a circle in the middle of the Masjid, toss the money up in the air, and whatever falls inside the circle is for the cause of Allah and whatever falls outside the circle is for us".

The third man who was very miserly then asked the two other men to accompany him outside. There he offered this suggestion: "What I would do with the money is this: Toss it up in the air, and whatever the angels catch is for the cause of Allah and whatever falls to the ground is ours".

[quote="Angel"]What does your name mean? check it out...

Instructions : What you do is find out what each letter of your name means.

Then connect all the meanings and it describes YOU.

PS : If you have double or triple letters, just count the meaning once

A= You can be very quiet when you have something on your mind.

B= You are always cautious when it comes to meeting newpeople.

C= You definitely have a partier side in you, don't be shy to show it.

D= You have trouble trusting people.

E =You are a very exciting person.

F= Everyone loves you.

G= You have excellent ways of viewing people.

H=You are not judgmental.

I =You are always smiling and making others smile.

J =Jealously

K =You like to try new things.

L= Love is something you deeply believe in.

M= Success comes easily to you.

N= You like to work, but you always want a break.

O= You are very open-minded.

P =You are very friendly and understanding.

Q = You are a hypocrite.

R=You are a social butterfly.

S= You are very broad-minded.

T= You have an attitude, a big one.

U= You feel like you have to equal up to people's standards.

V= You have a very good physique and looks.

W= You like your privacy.

X= You never let people tell you what to do.

Y= You cause a lot of trouble.

Z= You're always fighting with someone.[/quote]

Z= You're always fighting with someone

A= You can be very quiet when you have something on your mind.

R=You are a social butterfly.

A= You can be very quiet when you have something on your mind.

[quote="Sirus"]cant find the lyrics to Sami Yusuf's new song 'Mother'...and i cant be bothered transcribing em..........But what a beautiful and touching song. reminds me of my mummy all the tym 😢

this 1 you have to listen to, and i cant wait 4 the new album! 8)[/quote]

Blessed is your face

Blessed is your name

My beloved

Blessed is your smile

Which makes my soul want to fly

My beloved

All the nights

And all the times

That you cared for me

But I never realised it

And now it’s too late

Forgive me

Now I’m alone filled with so much shame

For all the years I caused you pain

If only I could sleep in your arms again

Mother I’m lost without you

You were the sun that brightened my day

Now who’s going to wipe my tears away

If only I knew what I know today

Mother I’m lost without you

Turkish:

Ben derdimi kime söyleyeyim

Sensiz ana

Senin kadrini hic bilemedim ben

Aziz ana

Resul buyurdu;

Cennet analarin ayaklari altinda

Senin hayalin aklimda,

ruhumda, ruyalarimda

Sen gittiginde canim gitti,

Ayrilik bir yaman dertti,

Dunya bana cefa etti,

Benim aziz anam

Aglarim ben bulut gibi,

Dilimdesin sarki gibi,

Gunahlarim derin derin

Hakkini helal et ana

To whom will I tell my sorrow

in your absence, mother?

I didn’t know your real value, my beloved mother

The Messenger (pbuh) said

“Paradise is under the mothers’ feet”

Your image is in my heart, my soul, and my dreams

When you left, my soul left

Our separation was painful

The world gave me pain

and sorrow my beloved mother

I cry like a cloud

You are like a song on my tongue

I’ve wronged you countless times

Forgive me mother

[b]If You Have Lost Hope

Then We Say To You...[/b]

by Shaykh Abū Muhammad Al-Maqdisī

Dear Brother, verily, we have not corrupted our thoughts

Regarding the Promise of the Deity, Mighty and Strong,

And shackles have not increased us, except in patience

And prisons have not increased us, except in certainty,

Nor have tortures against our Brethren

Nor the killing of the preachers, even if hundreds of them, increased us,

Other than raising the flag of our Īmān

And clearly manifesting the Tawhīd of Truth, of Religion,

We will water your seedling, with our Tawhīd

By the cutting of our veins, and the sacrificing of our blood,

We will lift your banner, with our Islām

By sacrificing our most important men, and a mighty patience,

So that it dominates, in defiance of the Tawāghīt

And that it rises and spreads throughout the Worlds,

Never will we bend away from the Jihād against the Tawāghīt

Nor will we ever deviate from the Trustworthy Path,

As long as the Clear Light of the Deity

Dominates the hearts of the Believers,

Never will we abandon the Truth, no matter what we face

Never will we become weak, never will we submit,

Never will we stray away from the Path of Confrontation

Never will we be harmed by the abandoning traitors,

We will continue on this path, regardless of the wounds

Regardless of the blood, regardless of the long-suffering,

We have an example in the men who have traversed

Upon the Path, walking upon it, they were loftier than the heights,

So here is Bilāl, marching to the Gardens

Never did he waver fearing the pagans,

And there is Suhayb, the Brother of the Muttaqīn

Selling his life for the profit of the Religion,

And Mus’ab, abandoning a life of comforts

Refusing to share a shadow with the luxurious,

Living to give victory to a Great Religion

Passing on as a martyr amongst the eternal,

Hundreds of thousands of the True Faithful

They fulfilled in perseverance, they marched on in certainty,

A party of them have fulfilled, and a party remains continuing

They have not altered, Nay! They remain determined and firm,

And we are in their steps continuing, marching

With the Help of the Deity, to assist a Religion,

What this Path is, is the Path of the defiant

And these are the milestones of a Mighty Religion,

Thus, one who truly yearns to enter into the Gardens

And covets to embraced by the Heavenly Virgin Maidens,

Certainly, the responsibilities of the Path…

Certainly, the payment of an expensive dowry…

Har Ghadi Badal Raha Hai Roop Zindagi

Chaav Hai Kahhi Hai Dhoop Zidnagi

Har Pal Yahan

Jee Bhar Jiyo Jo Hai Sama

Kal Ho Na Ho

Despair Not O My Brothers!

Shaykh Marwān Hadīd

rahimahullah

[b]Despair not, O my Brothers,[/b]

I am a Shahīd (witness, martyr) being tested,

Our lives have an appointed time,

But our meeting is in the Gardens,

Oh! What Joy I have with this death of mine!

Today I end my Ghurbah (the state of being a Stranger; separation from Home)!

So we meet our King, and Muhammad, and the Companions,

And my tranquility when I stand in the midst,

On the Day of Uproar, is with my courage,

To give victory to my Faith, and when my blood is spilling,

Is a glad tiding of the approaching of a Shahādah,

Remembering my Beloved Companions is my consolation,

When I am secluded, and I remember I will soon unveil my Brides (the Maidens of the Gardens),

The heart is always thankful, and patient in adversity,

And if I am struck down, then here is my blood,

On the Day of Resurrection it is my Āyah (proof),

The smell from it is fragrant,

The colour is the colour of the Rose,

Here is the blood of the stab,

It is my sweet basil, it is my happiness,

Oh what Joy for me! How delightful is this!

By the Lord of the Ka’bah: We have triumphed

“The Maidens of Paradise call out, out of joy of marrying a Shahīd,

And the Maidens refuse to marry the inactive,

And Gardens of Eden that no one attains their vastness,

Except a Shahīd whose praiseworthy venture was appealing…”

[From the poem, Wā Farhatā Zuff Ash-Shahīd]

[b]To My Precious Mother[/b]

[i]Ah! My mother, weep not for your son

For to the Divine Promise and Gardens, I have gone,

To the One Who can pardon my sins

And that which these two hands have transgressed in,

And I have left the amusements of the Lowly World

For a people who find in it their aspirations and goals,

And for the Pleasure of my Lord, I have given my soul

When He called me, I answered the Call,

Cry not, O Mother, for a son

Who went forth towards the sharp spears,

Seeking death in honour and pride

Refusing to live in humiliation,

I have left my blood, Precious Mother, behind me

Showing the path to the Gardens,

And here are my scattered limbs, narrating

To those who yearn, that this is the dowry (Mahr) for the Beautiful Maidens,

But the Dīn of Allāh, I testify, is more precious

To me than this life, in which all are bound to perish,

Precious Mother, I am wearing a crown

And dwelling in Castles, amongst the Choirs,

With a Virgin who hums to me melodies

Giving me drink from the tips of her fingers,

Because I fought, I have been embraced by her breasts

And her heart which is full of affection,

And verily I hope for a Day

When for you I can intercede,

So patience, in the Path of Allāh, patience

Because O Precious Mother, the Lowly World is a few seconds.[/i]

George W. Bush's Intelligence Quiz

Puzzled President

Cheney gets a call from his "boss", W.

"I've got a problem," says W.

"What's the matter?" asks Cheney.

"Well, you told me to keep busy in the Oval Office, so, I got a jigsaw puzzle, but it's too hard. None of the pieces fit together and I can't find any edges."

"What's it a picture of?" asks Cheney.

"A big rooster," replies W.

"All right," sighs Cheney, "I'll come over and have a look."

So he leaves his office and heads over to the Oval Office. W points at the jigsaw on his desk.

Cheney looks at the desk and then turns to W and says, "For crying out loud, Georgie - put the corn flakes back in the box."

[quote="Saadia Khan"]salaam

Jihad

Why can’t I do good anymore

Worship, pray

Why do I feel like this oh tell me!

Why is it that my heart is heavy?

I need something,

Someone

To get me out of this

It feels like hell

This is not me

Where has the good in me gone?

I don’t recognise myself

I can’t think straight

Look at everyone looking at me

They think I’m so good

I haven’t a bad deed to my name

They can’t see my soul

They can’t feel my addled emotions

They don’t realise what is going on inside

They don’t see the battle inside

They don’t feel the battle outside

This is what you call jihad

The battle of all battles

The battle with your own enemy

The enemy inside you

Called your nafs

Who resides in you

Who tempts you

To bad

Qulsoom Ul Nisa Razaque[/quote]

The Revival forum's newest member is the author of this lovely poem!

[quote="Seraphim"]George W. Bush's Intelligence Quiz

Puzzled President

Cheney gets a call from his "boss", W.

"I've got a problem," says W.

"What's the matter?" asks Cheney.

"Well, you told me to keep busy in the Oval Office, so, I got a jigsaw puzzle, but it's too hard. None of the pieces fit together and I can't find any edges."

"What's it a picture of?" asks Cheney.

"A big rooster," replies W.

"All right," sighs Cheney, "I'll come over and have a look."

So he leaves his office and heads over to the Oval Office. W points at the jigsaw on his desk.

Cheney looks at the desk and then turns to W and says, "For crying out loud, Georgie - put the corn flakes back in the box."[/quote]

😂 😂 😂 😂